Mirror, Mirror on the Wall....

I've been told that I moved to fast into relationships. Or that the men I've gotten serious with have falling in love with me too quickly. Also that I move in too fast with my boyfriends.

I love to get feedback from the people that are close to me and those who aren't because their opinions really do matter to me. But all the while, this makes me really think of what do they know that I don't?

I was married very quickly after my engagement and I agree with this. We moved in together after only 3 months. A mistake I made in which I learned from. At the end of the marriage he truly was not the guy for me regardless of how quickly things moved along. The next man, I waited a year and still I was told by all my friends that I moved to quickly. What is too quickly these days?! Should I wait 5 years, then maybe think about my feelings for this person? I mean why should there be a time stamp on this?

It frustrates me to hear people tell me I move to quickly when all the moves I've taken have been risks. Big ones. One's that I am glad happened because I've learned more about men and relationships at such a young age where 30 year old women are starting to understand all the things I've already experienced. I was married at 22. I've been a mother since 17. I've had 4 serious relationships and lived together in each of those. And I'm going to be 27 this year. I think people should reorder their comments/advise the next time they want to tell me I'm moving to fast. I think I grew up faster than my friends did. So really, they can't understand the decisions I make. They can only relate to an extent.

I've learned so much about myself and the things that I know I want in a man and the things I don't. I've learned about the things men need from a women and the things that they don't. Everyone comes to me for advise on their relationships even though I've been considered of moving too fast. I believe there is an order that should be followed, but never a time stamp.

If you like someone, and you're dating; meaning going out to public places together; should you wait 6 months before telling that person you really like him/her or is it natural for you to just say it when you feel it? If you felt that you love someone and there's been enough time that's passed that you won't scare that person away by saying it, do you just say it? Or do you wait a year because you don't want people telling you you're moving too fast? If you've been together a year and your strongest emotion you feel together is love, should you wait another 2 years before moving in together? Is moving in together after a year moving too fast? So you see how silly these time stamps are? I would enjoy meeting a couple that bases their emotions from a time line; 5 months together, say I love you; 1 year together,discuss moving in; 2 years, move in together; 3 years, hope to be engaged; 4 years be married; 1 year into marriage, schedule our sex; 2 years into marriage, get pregnant.....

I understand people have a plan. I have friends who are happy with their scheduled sex on Tuesday's and Friday's. But to label someone's love life as moving to fast is ridiculous. Every situation is different. But without the risk of taking any of it, you'll live in fear. You'll live in a box that becomes your safety zone, and maybe when you're 45 years old; you might decide to take a risk and meet someone. Then you know what will happen? You'll wonder why you didn't try it before.

It's like frozen yogurt. The majority of America eat ice cream. Ice cream is yummy and makes me fat but I can't stop eating it. It doesn't get me any where by always eating it....NOM NOM FREAKIN NOM! But then someone tells you about frozen yogurt and it makes your little brain ponder. You tell yourself you only know a few people that eat it but you're good with ice cream. Then you try that frozen yogurt and you realize that it is really good. Then you one day stop eating ice cream and stick to that frozen yogurt. Why haven't I been eating this all along? Because you're a dumb ass, that's why. No really.

If your friend asks you if they are moving too fast, give your honest advise. Otherwise you'll just be judging them. Friends shouldn't judge each other; they should just hold their index finger out with the straight up truth. Friends are each other's mirrors. They are there to help see the risks that are being taken, not to take the risks away from you. Then when a friend comes crying saying you were right, learn to comfort that person.

If you are MY friend, you should feel lucky. Because I will never lie to you. I would also tell you if your make-up looks bad even if it hurts your feelings. Because I am a real friend. You want to know if you look like shit today? You probably do if you're asking me; a true friend.

And I'm ending this with an LOL because I love myself.

She's Beautiful

A man sees a women with all her glitz and gorgeous lips,
he realizes it was the rhinestones on her jeans and the gloss on her lips,
But he said he also had her scent on his shirt,
expensive perfume she wore every so often when Cosmo came in,
He was so sure she was beautiful in the morning,
he realized only that one time when she didn't wash her make-up off,
Her nails manicured and her hair trimmed nicely,
But again just that one time he took her out,
A man sees a women with all her glitz and gorgeous lips,
as he truly sees a frame but no picture,
a painting with no paint,
A man sees a women with all her glitz and gorgeous lips,
to find out he wanted a women,
not a frame with no picture,
and a painting with no paint.