Coffee

It’s early and everyone is rushing to grab their coffee to go and a quick breakfast. The baristas are receiving large requests along with ridiculous instructions of how the latte should be made.

There are about three people in front of me, and suddenly I hear this women giving the barista this complicated order and when the barista offered to repeat the order the women says ‘’a professional would never repeat the order, be sure it’s right”. Wow. There are real people out there like this? The barista called out her order, and guess what… There was too much soy milk in the one order that called for light soy milk. The women began to yell and become angry. She pointed to all of the customer’s waiting and said that they are lucky to have us in order for them to stay in business. She continued with her rant and advised all the workers behind the counter to just quit their jobs and go work at Burger King. The manager, wherever he was, finally came out and asked her to leave as she was disrupting a peaceful place where people come to relax.

The women purposely threw the drinks on the floor and dashed out. The building’s walls are all windows so you can see her stomping around as she began to dial up her phone. A few customer’s rush outside and ask her to stop swearing as there were small children around but she paid no attention to them. The security guards for the mall area came by to try and diffuse her anger but she belittled them and called them terrible names. A police officer was called as she was disrupting the peace, and whatever he said to her made her leave.

This woman looked like she just stepped out of a fashion show. She was in her late 30’s early 40’s, cashmere red lipstick, heavy eye make-up. Her perfume was horrid. She also looked like she is extremely high in stress. I try not to judge. But I do pay attention and while we were all in line before the mess happened, I adored her outfit, her make-up. But as soon as she opened her mouth, a monster was unleashed.

I know people have dark stories that affected them as a person. I know a lot of people who could have became nasty because of what’s happened to them. But there is a level of mutual respect that we, as a human race must accept. The person in from of you or behind you in line has no idea who you are. As you do not know them. You have no right to unleash your demons on them. You do not have the right to belittle someone because you feel satisfaction from that twisted action.

Respect is key in every day to day activity. You are an adult. You control your actions. You are where you are today because of what you have done. Everyone has bad days, but we can’t spoon feed you and wipe your ass every time shit hits the fan.

I commend the baristas at this coffee shop for remaining professional and understanding that they have a business to run, not a daycare. They say that when you have a bad experience somewhere you go and tell ten of your friends. But for me, an innocent by-standard who watched from afar will go tell ten of my friends how awesome this coffee shop is and how they remained polite to a person who tried to discourage them in front of many.

Later that week, I went back to the coffee shop for my usual. The barista gal apologized for the outbreak that happened earlier in the week, we exchanged a few laughs. And she told me that the company the woman worked for, sent an apology letter to them for their employee’s actions. Since that woman was the one who picked up everyone’s coffee she represented them as a company. Let’s just say, there’s a new coffee girl and she is pretty friendly. I met her myself and thanked her for her kindness and bought her a coffee for it.

Cheers everyone.

The Real You

Our faces, our bodies are the shields to curiosity,
The shield to those outside our bubbles,
And the unknown.

So we hide,
Behind our fashion,
Behind our career,
Behind our anger.

But over time,
Through those tears,
Will shine a better you, a better life.

Imagine your face is made from clay,
And as those tears trickle down,
It slowly erases that mask.

What appears, is you. Me.
A smile, bright eyes,
And glowing skin.

The real you.

Then slowly your arms,
They will begin to embrace change,
And learn to pat yourself on the back.

Later will comes your legs,
While they've been stuck,
You've had enough time to realize how to
Set yourself free.

And once that realization has come about,
It will be the most beautiful thing,
You will be able to smile about.

The real you will want to thank you later.

Technically Speaking...

For the first time in my life, someone accused me of being fake. I wasn’t sure how to react, since this person is someone who was commenting on the same status update from someone I know (you know, those heated FB conversations). Technically, a person who is on my FB that I have met once but know his life through social media. Well if anyone ever called me that, it was never to my knowledge.

But I just wanted to remind you people how fake I am. I think this person knows me way to well and I have to say they were right on point! Shall we begin? Lets!

I’m fake because I’m not really 28. I’m really 28 years, 11 months and 3 weeks old.

I should be ashamed of myself.

I’m fake because I wasn’t born with ombre hair. I was born with brown hair. I don’t know what to say.

I’m fake because I told someone they deserved to be happy. This one is definitely going way too far. I will watch my words next time, mommy.

I’m fake because I commented on a status to show some support. I think I should be spanked for this, yup.

I’m fake because I have no great come backs. Just silly words like, ‘you have ugly bangs’ and ‘you’re annoying’. LOL super disappointed.

I’m fake because I don’t know how to get violent on FB.

I’m fake because I don’t hang out with every single one of my FB friends. I know…

I’m fake because I have a full time job, 2 kids in school, a fiancé and my parents and brother. I should know better!

I’m fake because I can’t make time to see my own friends plus the ones on FB that have no idea of my private life. But apparently we should be friends and bowl and shit.

I’m fake because I have a best friend. What nerve do I have to have a best friend! Sheesh.

I’m fake because I love God. I love him so much that I sometimes put his name on FB. What world are we living in! I know! I should be banned from Earth for saying God.

Oh, I almost forgot. I am SO FAKE, because I wasn’t there to physically be there for someone when they were having a rough time. I mean, that is how all this fake-ness started.

It definitly goes to show how shallow people are. This was my first Fb fist fight, I definitly lost because I had nothing else to say to ugly bangs, but oh well. I like to chose my batttles. Like fighting for chocolate cupcakes over vanilla.

Thank you for reading everyone! I am so glad you all know how fake I am!

Life goes on with or without your shoes

Everyone has the right to satisfaction. To peace. To believe in something.

We grow up with the lessons we learned from teachers, parents, friends and enemies. It's our job to make something of it. If you're happy it's because you want to be. Same with being miserable or unhappy. Granted there are those that need further help, but kudos to those who can admit and seek the help they need.

Most of us have been down a dark road enough times to know what we shouldn't take for granted and what we can live without.

I feel in my heart that a simple smile at a stranger, a quick hello to your neighbor or striking up a conversation with someone who always tries to make small talk can make a difference. The small things are usually the best. Baby steps towards a better feeling you never hurt anyone.

There are going to be people out there that feed on the weak, the saddened, the fearful and the loners. Those people get their satisfaction from that. It's sad. But who am I to judge? I don't know what's happened to them, I don't know if they were ever loved enough. But what I do know, that experiencing negativity in my own life never got me anywhere. It never improved my confidence nor did it ever help me with relationships. Only until I realized, I needed to get my act together first before putting on a show.

Positive energy will bring good things. Life will put you through tests (I personally believe God is responsible for that) but life really isn't meant to be easy peasy. But you have to put that into action, if you don't believe you can turn things around; you have to know that it will be a hard life. It will be a struggle.

My hearts been broken so many times, I could of cried all day, became depressed or killed myself. But what good would all that do? My kids have been away from me for long periods of time, I could of been a bitch or complain to everyone. But would that make me a better mom? No. I lost friends over stupid things, did I try and fix things? Yes. Is there only so much you can do? Damn right!

I'm 28 years old, I've lived a life enough to be 58. I know. It's sad. But not to me. I have embraced my mistakes, my failures and learned to adjust and resolve. Do I still get annoyed and upset, duh! I'm not perfect! Just my shoes...

But what I mean people, is that you need to get off that couch! Out of your house! And get some fresh air! People! People! We need your money! Oops, sorry! Got all Little Rascals on you!

Honestly, it's 2013 and we are making the same mistakes! Haven't we as a society learned enough to know! I mean, we go to school, we go to college, you stay single or get married you have kids. They do the same. All the same emotions are there. Except now they try and convince us that a little medicine will help make us better... Man, I could go on but I'm tired. I also hate typing on an iPad.

Tonight, someone asked me to "go fuck yourself", I took that as an opportunity for entertainment. I'm bad at come backs and arguing. I just am. The best I got was trying to wish someone a flat tire. Lame, right! But boy, this person seriously loved to dispute. Who am I to stop her. She also referred I was new to the Internet. I didn't correct her though because my life is consumed by reality. So sometimes I am new to the Internet ;) I mean I have only been blogging since 2009. What do I know.

Alright chicks and dicks, I'm signing off and wishing everyone a safe weekend!

Peace!

A Life Worth Fighting For

This morning I read a terrible post on Facebook by my younger brother. He mentioned he had the worst day and that he was called "fag" several times at work by customers. The first emotion that hit me was anger, then sadness. I think its natural to want to be there and defend someone you love when they are in those types if situations. And when you can't, it hurts.

If you know me and my family well, you know my younger brother is gay; my parents are very religious and that we all love each other. When my brother told us he was gay, it was a surprise but wasn't at the same time. We accepted him, there wasn't a question or doubt. We love him, our Lord gave us this person; he brought him into our lives.

Its so true when you hear the phrase "born this way". This is the solid reason any homosexual person can give you. As children no one kneels by there bedside and prays to be a homosexual. No one prays to be made this way, you are just born that way. You are. Its in your blood, bones and soul. No one chooses to be this way. And the way people, the world react is just appalling to me. The world is so focused on gay marriage and how they can raise children. Have we lost all sight?

What do we call all the bad mothers, fathers, sex traffickers, molesters, kidnappers, murderers out there? They weren't born that way, they chose to be that way. They allowed themselves to be taken by the dark side, and they had a choice. I know there are mentally ill people out there that commit terrible crimes, but that is not the group I am talking about. I am talking about the women who know they shouldn't have children and do. The men who chose to get a women pregnant and know they will not stick around. The groups out there that think its okay to enslave a child into sex trafficking. A person who feels touching a child in sexual ways is okay. A person who kidnaps someone to remove them from society and think there is no wrong in that. The people who don't have the right to end someone's life. What about those people? WHY ARE WE NOT FOCUSING ON THESE PEOPLE?????? WHY ARE WE FOCUSING ON GAY MEN AND WOMEN WHO WANT TO LIVE PEACEFUL LIFE'S????

Sure those people make headlines, sure you talk about it amongst your peers. But then the topic fades until the next terrible thing happens. But giving gay men and women any rights is milk in everyone's coffee. I can't remember the last time I read, heard or saw something in the news about a soulless act committed by a gay person. I just can't. Can you? Oh wait, yes I can. I remember it was only a few months ago that gay men and women wanted to marry because they loved each other and wanted to dedicate their lives to one another and it did make headline news. In fact, people were so outraged that they started rioting... I guess loving someone, really is a crime.

I don't give a fuck who you are, I don't care where you came from, I don't care what race you are - but if you think you have been giving a life that only our Lord leads to be able to call ANYONE ANY kind of hurtful name; you truly have been giving a life that only the devil leads.

You are given one life, one heart, one soul. After that, your actions will guide you to where you belong once you've passed.

Remember that the gay man and women who live amongst us are symbols of love and peace. And to that, this is all they seek.

Our race is so corrupted that the real focus has been jaded and the real problems are becoming okay in our society. I am a daughter, a mother, a friend, a sister and this is what I see through my eyes. My own opinion. My own words.

Life will never makes sense, don't kill yourself trying to make sense of it.

A prayer for those who were born the way you are:

DEAR LORD,
I PRAY FOR STRENGTH,
AS OTHERS ARE AGAINST ME.
DIFFERENT I AM,
AS OTHERS CAUSE PAIN.
I AM GAY,
MY BELIEFS IN YOU,
WILL NEVER STRAY.
I PRAY FOR OUR WORLD,
AS OTHERS ARE AGAINST YOU.
DIFFERENT YOU ARE NOT,
AS OTHERS SEEM TO BE.
I AM GAY,
MY BELIEFS IN YOU,
WILL NEVER STRAY.

Serendipity

My boyfriend Fred is a very extravagant man, he is very interested in luxory and will pull all the stops for any special moment. He loves to travel and I have found myself by his side every time. He is truly a man of his word and will do anything to make my dreams come true. Literally. Every comment that I mentioned the phrase 'my dream is too..." and pretty much come true. I wanted to see NYC, Paris and guess what - he made it all happen. I am extremely lucky.

So here is how he began to plan this surprise trip that had surprises along the way.

Surprise #1 Fred and I are sitting on our couch watching the tree lighting in Rockefeller center and I begin to look up the weather for New Orleans to see how heavy of a jacket I will need. Fred asks me to look up the weather for NYC and I say to him, who cares we are not traveling there. WELL, his response, you should care we are going next week! At this point I am speechless and I give him this look of excitement and confusion, hahaha! He starts to explain why we are going and its going to be my Christmas present that will include a shopping spree :).

Surprise #2 One week later, the night before our flight to NYC - Fred asks me if his blue jeans are okay to wear on the flight and I said of course they are silly! He says, well they are not good enough for first class! I pretty much almost shit my pants! I am jumping around and shouting with excitement and jumping on him asking if he is joking, haha! He wasn't joking and we flew first class which was so great because I s felt like a princess.

Surprise #3 We have a driver picking us up from the airport, and I notice that we are driving into lower Manhattan. We pull up to the Trump Soho!!! I am not convinced this is our hotel but then we walk in and check in and then we are standing in our amazing room. I was ashamed to think we would stay any where knowing how Fred does things :).

Surprise #4 The next morning we wake up, head out to the Cupping Room Cafe to grab some grub before heading out to 5th avenue. Breakfast was great and we heading out, we went to tons of different stores, got some good things and headed back to the hotel to get ready for dinner. So obviously I needed like an hour to get dressed, Fred tells me he doesn't feel good so he takes a nap. Once he is up and ready he heads down stairs to make sure our car is here. I am thinking, why does he need to go downstairs, why can't he call? I didn't have time to ask questions, I was concerned with my stupid false eye lashes and wondering why it wasn't staying on, grrr! SO I toss that shit and hear Fred come up like 15 minutes later. I said, why were you down there so long, apparently there was traffic and other shit going on. Finally we head down stairs and Fred said a white car is picking us up and I don't see a white car. We keep walking and we come up to a Chrysler 300 black limo and the driver decides to say, Hi Fred! They shake hands, I am like WTF and he opens the door and says he is ready to go. I ask Fred, is this for us?? As I am giggling because all this is so amazing I can't believe it was real.

Surprise #5 We are heading out to Rockefeller center to check out the tree. The streets are blocked, our driver can't get through so he drops us off and we walk a few blocks. We make a quick turn and there is the tree! Full of magic and life and just being able to be there with my love and watch everyone around us was awesome. He starts to mumble sweet things as to how he is going to start doing things from now. We make this joke of how he really does do so much and then says, 'but I haven't done anything yet' and so I was really happy to hear him say that for himself lol :). Then he begins to ask me what today was, I responded with the normal answer and said it was Saturday. He says, no, what's the date. I say its December 8th, I am thinking I missed something because he never asks me things like this in this type of setting. Then he says, 'yes today is December 8th, many many years ago my grandfather got down on his knee and asked my grandmother to marry him and I would like to do the same and ask you to make me the luckiest man', he got on one knee and asked if I would marry him. And of course I said YES! Omg it was amazing, a beautiful feeling, nothing that I was ever capable of feeling before. Thousands of people cheered and clapped for us, it really was magically. He then introduces to me Conrad, his buddy ol pal who has been following us and snapping pictures of the entire thing! AWESOME! Conrad you are the best! Oh and another thing, Fred bought a new camera and shipped it to Conrad to use for this moment and we got to take it home with us!

Surprise #6 We venture on to find our driver and his elegant limo, we head out to dinner, but first we make a pit stop to (drum roll please) Georgetown Cupcakes!!!!! Oh tthe cupcakes were yummy! Okay so then we proceeded to dinner and as we pull up, Fred tells me how famous this place is because the owner is a chef on the cooking channel. Lidia Bastianich is the owners of Becco - FYI. We go inside to let the hostes know we are her and she says 'oh, you're party is waiting outside'. I'm like what! Who is here! Well, Fred's family drove in from Jersey to spend this day with us! I was way too excited to see everyone! The his mom walks out (she lives in AZ) - he flew her out here AND THEN my brother strolls out and I lost it. I cried like a baby, I couldn't believe my brother was there and that Fred has planned this for so long. It was his dream to visit NYC, so there were 2 dreams in the making.

I am truly and excited, blessed, happy, grateful women. I have the 2 funniest kids and a true man who is not only the peace I feel in my heart but the joy I feel through out the day. There are lots of men out there that can make you happy and say all the right things. But there isn't many who can contribute to the joy and peace in your life.

Everything I have been through, everyone one I have known has brought me to this moment and us together. Thank you to everyone who was a part of it to make that day so spectacular!

Hugs!

Then and Now

It takes years of emotions,
hurtful words,
lakes of tears,
to understand how to let go.
It takes blind eyes,
a numb heart,
no mirror's,
to be able to stick around.
It takes high walls,
pounds of doubt,
fear in your blood,
to think love isn't really out there.
It takes a stranger's conversation,
the cold hard truth,
understanding,
to be able to know it only gets better.
It takes the right one,
a handful of right choices,
a kiss that changes your life,
to know everything happened for a reason.